24th April 1982 for three weeks

I remember hearing this song when I was a child and think it was about a piano. I had no idea it was about racial harmony until I was much older.

And when I understood it when I was older I realised how bloody awful this song is on so many levels. Maybe times have changed and singing about racial harmony in such a twee way now feels very strange. But I think that actually the song is just awful.

I hope I never hear it again.

0/10

17th April 1982 for one week

This is the third time I’ve written about Bucks Fizz and it will be the last. Despite being similar in sound, there’s something about My Camera Never Lies that is just poor. It is as if they were unashamedly pop before and now they are trying to sound a bit more serious. Or something? I don’t know, it is just not as good.

I don’t recall ever hearing it before and I’m not really surprised. I finished listening to it thirty seconds ago and I can’t remember what it sounded like.

Another You have to wonder what was going on in 1982. The Lion Sleeps Tonight was followed by Seven Tears? What were people thinking. Completely forgettable.

2/10

27th March 1982 for three weeks

You have to wonder what was going on in 1982. The Lion Sleeps Tonight was followed by Seven Tears? What were people thinking.

I have literally never heard this before in my life. Parts of it sound a bit like Auld Lang Syne. That doesn’t make it a good thing.

This is just awful and I hope that listening to it now is the one and only time I ever hear it.

1/10

6th March 1982 for three weeks

I know exactly when I first heard this song – it was when watching Friends Season 2 episode 12.

Since then I’ve heard it over the years and heard it loads. What a random novelty hit in the middle of 1982. I guess there have been weirder songs to reach Number 1.

The Lion Sleeps Tonight is one of the cheesiest songs ever and should be celebrated for its unashamed lack of shit what anyone thinks of it.

4/10

13th February 1982 for three weeks

I cannot for the life of me remember hearing this for the first time. But somehow it is a song that I love. It is just a superb song – instantly memorable and uplifting!

Even when they run out of ideas for words and bop-bop it out, the whole thing just works!

It wouldn’t be out of place on today’s chart, 38 years later!

It is definitely a favourite of mine and it has been used in films and TV shows over the years!

I have literally just listened to Precious for the first time. I’ve never heard it before now. The right song was the big success from the single. Precious is not good.

10/10

6th February 1982 for one week

Well, I don’t think I’d ever heard Computer Love before writing this blog post. I thought I was streaming the wrong song – I thought it was some sort of bad electronic cover of a Coldplay song. No, apparently I was listening to Computer Love. Talk by Coldplay used the tune. It’s a catchy tune, but it just feels a bit dull. The tune doesn’t go anywhere.

The Model is a song that I have heard over the years. I’m sure it’s been on TV shows or in films – I know that I’ve heard it somewhere. It is a much better song than Computer Love.

I wonder if, when it was first released, this double A-side from Kraftwerk was considered cutting edge. It’s a bit dancy which was not typical of the sound of the time. Nowadays it just feels tame and dull.

4/10

30th January 1982 for one week

There’s not a lot to say about this. Shakin’ Stevens clearly has a formula for Number Ones – this is the third of his I’ve written about. But it has the same sort of sound as both of his others.

I imagine that if you were called Julie in 1982 you hated this song.

It hasn’t aged well, and that is why you are unlikely to have ever heard this. I don’t think I have until now.

3/10

16th January 1982 for two weeks

Ok, if you were to look at the single cover and make an assumption about the quality of the song, you’d say The Land Of Make Believe was pure cheese – dreadful. In fact, the song has an alluring quality which the cheesiness spoils. It’s pure cheese pop and one with a great melody.

It has probably not aged well but it is still nice to listen to. It’s the sort of song I expect to dad dance to at birthday parties at some point. Too slow to dance properly to, so you’d just look like a guy who likes cheesy pop.

7/10